I put every in quotes up there because invariably these lists never apply to me entirely, or in part, or even in insignificant part. Truth be told, I can't imagine they all would apply to any person that actually exists; just more faux-niche (when your market constitutes a full half of the world's population, how is it actually "niche" in any meaningful sense?) writing designed to be seen and talked about. Not going to give them the benefit of a link; the curious among you can Google it. Anyway, I was bored on a Saturday night when I came across this on Pinterest. Whenever someone titles an article as "Bits and Bobbles Every Girl Needs!" or "Whosiewhatsits Every Woman Should Know How to Use!" I am always curious to see how I stack up against the Ur-Woman the author is imagining. Time to tally it up!
I do not, and probably will not ever, own anything in cashmere. Or a salad spinner. 0 / 101
101. Despite what it says on the tag, cashmere is best washed by hand. To dry it, use a salad spinner, which releases excess water in seconds.
100. Use white wine to remove red wine stains.Not strictly fashion advice, but I suppose when you're stretching to fill a list any trick will do. Not particularly useful for me (I go more for whisky than red wine) but I might need it someday. 1 / 101
99. Wash new jeans twice before taking them to the tailor. Why? Because jeans will always shrink in length when washed.I wear jeans. I wish I had done this before I got a couple pairs tailored. 2 / 101
Angora and mohair belong to the same category as cashmere: not in my closet. 2 / 101
98. To stop angora or mohair from shedding, fold the garment and place it into a zip-top bag and freeze it for at least three hours.
Or just throw them in your next load of laundry? 2 / 101
97. Remove odors from vintage or thrift clothing by spritzing them with a mixture of one part vodka, two parts water.
96. “Remove white deodorant marks from a garment by gently rubbing the protective foam used on hangers against the fabric.” — Jonathan Simkhai, designerIt's actually embarrassing how many times I've forgotten to put on deodorant until after I've dressed myself (or forgotten to put any on at all), so a few of my tops have that deodorant cruft on them. 3 / 101
95. If you get an oil stain on your favorite handbag, coat the mark with baby powder and let it stand overnight. By morning, the stain should be gone. If a bit still remains, repeat the process until the stain is completely gone.But what about my favorite skirt? By singling out handbags, do they mean to imply this trick only works with (faux) leather? I'm assuming yes. Perhaps useful for other leather things as well. 4 / 101
Diamonds are terrible. 4 / 101
94. The best at-home method to keep diamonds sparkling: liquid dishwasher detergent and an old toothbrush.
93. The secret to well-fitting everyday clothes is Lycra. The formulas to look for: 95% cotton/5% Lycra spandex for T-shirts, and at least 2% Lycra for jeans to hold their shape.At this point, I would like to commend the writers for their correct use of "everyday." When you are describing the frequency with which you do something, "every day" is the correct usage: "I wash my pet alpaca every day." When you are using it as an adjective to mean "normal" or "daily," it becomes a compound word: "This tote bag is great for your everyday drug smuggling needs." That being said, it's also somewhat useful. I'll keep it. 5 / 101
Hahahahahahahahah no. 5 / 101
92. “Always organize your clothes going light to dark from left to right in your closet. Your eye will follow the color and thus help you stay organized.” — Melanie Charlton Fascitelli, Founder, Clos-ette and Clos-ette Too.
Not wondering about the quality of the cashmere I don't have. 5 / 101
90. Wondering about the quality of your cashmere? Gently stretch the body of the garment to see if it snaps back. A lower-quality cashmere won’t.
Okay, say what?! I am not immune to the depression and humiliation that comes with those shopping outings tryings-on, so a tip about finding the right fit is welcome. However, I have to wonder: what is the benefit to wrapping the waistband of my jeans (is it only jeans, or all trousers?) around my neck when compared with the tried and true method of holding them up to my waist and seeing if they make it halfway around? I mean, aside from giving the shop clerks something to laugh at. Maybe there is some mystical connection between my neck and my waist that I have yet to unlock, but the halfway-hips method has yet to let me down.
89. “If you don’t have time to try on jeans in the store, try the Neck Method: You can determine your size by placing the waistline of the jeans around the diameter of your neck. If the waistline of the pant comfortably meets at back of your neck, then the jeans will fit.”— Sarah Ahmed, Creative Director, DL1961 Premium Denim
Incidentally, this tip DID bring back fond memories of high school; the uniform skirts we wore in orchestra had such a gap (where you'd expect a zipper or buttons or something to be) that it was possible to velcro the closure around your neck (as opposed to sticking your head through the hole meant for your torso) and wear it like a cape, which I totally did a couple of times. Thanks for the memory, Sarah Ahmed. 5 / 101
I don't have trouble keeping my wardrobe down to a manageable, wearable size. 5 / 101
88. Cut down your closet by 25% by asking yourself this one question: “If I were shopping right this second, would I buy this?” If the answer’s no, out it goes. — Melanie Charlton Fascitelli, Founder, Clos-ette and Clos-ette Too.
This one falls in the category of "probably very useful, but not applicable to me." I've always just run my bathing suit under the tap and let it hang dry outside or in the shower. It's held up just fine and doesn't have any weird stains or smells. 5 / 101
87. “Never put your swimwear in the washing machine, and always hand dry. The machine will damage the suit and it will lose its elasticity. The only exception: At the end of the summer or vacation, wash your swimwear in lingerie washing bags on the gentle cycle with a bit of Drift or Woolite. But only after many wears.” —Shoshanna Gruss, Designer
OH GOD NO NOT THE BLOAT. 5 / 101
86. To drop bloat five days before a big event, stay away from dairy and whole grains, which can do a number on the digestive system.
I don't like the look of diamonds and my ears will most likely go to the grave unpierced. 5 / 101
85. While fake designer bags are a huge don’t, fake diamond studs are a huge do. Faux stones are hard to spot to the untrained eye.
Seems like this would be common sense. Considering my aversion to fashion trends, dressy occasions, and going to important events in anything other than something I know looks presentable and relatively flattering, not something I really needed to hear. 5 / 101
84. Dressy occasions aren't the time to play with trends, so know your silhouette and stick to it to always look your best. Perfect example: Sofia Vergara knows she looks good in mermaid dresses, and always chooses variations of the shape on red carpets.
83. “Never put a garment on immediately after ironing, as this can actually cause new wrinkles to form. Instead, let it sit for five minutes to set the press.” — Althea Harper, Designer and Rowenta Brand AmbassadorSometimes I iron things! 6 / 101
82. The best way to de-fuzz a sweater: use a pumice stone.And sometimes I wear sweaters! Just not cashmere ones. 7 / 101
I totally found a pair of clip-ons for flats in a box of stuff in my closet once, I was utterly perplexed by them and Lawyer Mom had to explain their purpose to me. Despite my unpierced ears, I don't actually own any clip-on earrings. And if I did, I wouldn't use them on shoes or shirt collars. I suspect it looks more tacky than trendy. 7 / 101
81. Snap clip-on earrings onto flats for an instant evening shoe, or onto shirt collars for DIY embellishments.
80. If you get wax on a piece of clothing, layer wax paper over the hardened wax and then run an iron over it to loosen it up. Once you pull off the paper, the wax should come right out with it.Not that I can imagine very many scenarios where I would end up with wax on clothing. Wax on tablecloths, however, is another matter. 8 / 101
79. Pour a dash of vodka into vase water to extend the life of your flowers. 9 / 101
Not really fashion but sometimes I like to have cut flowers around so I'll take it!
Tights are from the great Satan. I'd rather go bare-legged or wear some cotton leggings. 9 / 101
78. Spray tights with sticky (read: cheap) hairspray to avoid holes and runs.
77. To clean dirt off suede, remove the crust from a piece of bread and allow it to become stale. Gently rub dirt and stains with the edge of the stale bread, and they’ll disappear. To de-scuff suede, use an eraser or nail file.Potentially useful and worth a save. 10 / 101
76. Shopping for a wedding dress or another big-event outfit? Head to the store with makeup on, proper undergarments, and your hair semi-done to get a better sense of how it’ll look.
Shopping for a wedding dress? Hair done? Getting a new outfit for an event? That's rich. 10 / 101
75. Double-stick tape work to shorten a hem in a pinch if you can’t get to the tailor before an event.Or iron-on hem tape! Good to be reminded that you can fake a solution to something yourself, though. 11 / 101
74. Blot, don’t rub, when you spill something on your clothes. Wiping or rubbing will actually further ingrain the stain into the weave.
I think this is probably the best tip so far! 12 / 101
Uh, sure? Since I'm not a celebrity, I don't think ~VPL~ is something I really need to concern myself with. 12 / 101
73. “Panty lines are not okay! Every woman should invest in nude, seamless underwear.” — Giuliana Rancic, HSN designer and E! host
72. If you don’t feel like trying on a dress but still want to see where the hem will hit you, align the shoulder seam exactly with your shoulder bone (not your collarbone).Why not? 13 / 101
Sounds simple in theory, but probably pretty annoying to do in practice, at least for sweaters. A BLANKET ON THE COUCH NO WAY~ 13 / 101
71. Repurpose old or thrift sweaters and blankets by using them to reupholster a throw pillow, a chair seat or cover a stool.
I don't wear lipstick! 14 / 101
70. “Use hairspray to remove a lipstick stain.” – Kaelen Haworth, designer, KAELEN
69. Add a 1/2 cup of distilled white vinegar to the final rinse cycle while doing laundry to maintain the wash of your favorite pair of dark jeans.Second-best tip so far! 15 / 101
Or don't buy shoes unless they fit. 15 / 101
68. To stretch tight shoes, fill two freezer bags with water and place into each shoe. Let it freeze overnight. As the water freezes, it’ll gently expand your shoes.
I don't have any scarves, vintage or otherwise, that I don't wear. And I have other things I'd rather frame. 15 / 101
67. Frame vintage scarves for cool original artwork.
66. Due to its high level of surfactants, Dawn dish detergent is especially successful at removing grease and oil stains from clothing.Is Dawn really that much better than other dish detergents? Or is it just dish detergents in general (minus the hippy-dippy ones that avoid surfactants in favor of true soaps)? Regardless: pretty useful. 16 / 101
65. “A flattering silhouette begins with the right underpinnings. Never underestimate the power of Spanx—they’re a girl’s best friend!” — Lucy Sykes Rellie, Fashion Director, Rent the Runway
How much would this cost compared to just buying a whole new coat? And who gives a shit about the lining of your coat anyway? I keep my coats closed because usually I'm wearing them in cold weather. 16 / 101
64. Revamp an old coat by swapping out the buttons and having a tailor replace the lining with something eye-catching, like a pattern or a bright color.
This one sounds like a good idea, but only in the "it's better to save something than throw it away" sense. Never once I have I changed my mind about a hem length; I deliberate for a while before I take something to a tailor. I imagine the extra fabric at the bottom would start to irritate me, as well. I'll take a pass on this tip, even if it's not inherently bad or totally useless. 16 / 101
63. When getting jeans shortened, always ask your tailor to reattach the original hem. It may cost extra, but it’s worth it.
62. If blush or bronzer breaks in your handbag, pre-moistened makeup removing wipes will clean up the loose powder flawlessly.As if I carry blush or bronzer. 16 / 101
Isn't this the same as #68? 16 / 101
61. Break in stiff or too-snug shoes by slipping them on with socks and blasting your feet with a hot hairdryer.
60. Hang a shoe bag on the back of your bathroom door and use it to hold makeup, toiletries, brushes, hair ties, etc.Okay, not a fashion tip, but there is nothing I love more than good door storage, even if my toiletries consist of a comb, toothpaste, and a toothbrush. 17 / 101
59. A vintage trunk not only makes a stylish coffee table, but it can also house shoes and clothing you rarely wear.Again, not a fashion tip, but one I can appreciate as a person moving into a very small apartment. But vintage trunk? No thanks, I'll just stick with a storage ottoman from Ikea. 17 / 101
58. “To remove watermarks from leather boots, add a few drops of vinegar to a bowl of cool water and scrub the stains with a soft bristle brush until stains are no longer visible. Let dry overnight.” — Daryl Carr, Marketing Coordinator, StetsonI don't own leather boots, but my boyfriend does enjoy working with leather and I'm sure I'll acquire some leather goods from him in the future. 18 / 101
57. To stop squeaky shoes, remove the insole and apply Vaseline or WD-40 before replacing it.A good idea, but I bet removing and replacing the insole is easier said than done. 19 / 101
56. To determine if pearls are real, lightly rub them over your teeth. Fake pearls will be perfectly smooth, and real ones will feel slightly gritty or textured.This is a legit tip! If you don't want to gross anyone out, use your fingernail instead. 20 / 101
55. When you’re shopping for a jacket, coat, or blazer, pay attention to the fit around the shoulders. While a tailor can tweak pretty much everything about the fit of a jacket—from tapering the waist to shortening it—they can’t change the shoulders. Make sure the seams sit perfectly at the bony tops of your shoulders.Good to know! 21 / 101
Could not give a shit about looking "chic" when I'm trying to stay warm. 21 / 101
54. Chic up a sporty puffer vest by cinching the waist with a skinny belt.
53. Unless they’re cropped or tapered, pant hems should just graze the tops of your shoes and be from 1/2-inch to 3/4-inch off the floor.But what if they are cropped or tapered? Nonetheless, good to know. 22 / 101
The idea of "storing" clothing boggles my mind. I don't have enough space (or clothing) in my life to store things. 22 / 101
52. Always dry-clean coats before storing them, and place on cedar hangers inside cloth garment bags. This preserves the fabric and keeps moths away.
Who in the world keeps their shoes in shoeboxes, small closet or no? The only fit place for shoes is by the door. 22 / 101
51. If you have a small closet, never keep your shoes in clunky shoeboxes. Instead, always line up them on the floor.
How about no. 22 / 101
50. Going to a winter wedding or formal event? Try wearing a sleeveless fur vest as a top, cinching it with a skinny belt or piece of ribbon and pairing it with a floor-length skirt.
In addition to cashmere, mohair, and angora, fur (faux or otherwise) will never be something in my wardrobe. 22 / 101
49. How to care for fur at home: “Pass the fur with a hairbrush and steam it for added bounce, volume and shine.” —Eran Elfassy, Co-Creative Director, Mackage
48. “Marquise ring shapes help to create the illusion of longer, more slender fingers, even on small wide hands. Pear or oval stones are also flattering.” — Carol Brodie, Fine Jewelry Designer, HSN’s Rarities: Fine Jewelry with Carol BrodieI can't say that I pay much attention to how flattering (or not) someone's ring is to their hand, but good to know regardless. 23 / 101
47. Everyday bras should be replaced every three to six months, as that’s when they start to lose elasticity and support.Good one to know! You should also always fasten them at the outside, moving inwards as the fabric stretches and loses elasticity. Support in bras comes from the band, so if the band is too loose your bra isn't going to fit properly. 24 / 101
I don't care for pencil skirts. 24 / 101
46. Ideally, a pencil skirt should hit just at the top of your knee. Any lower and it will start to shorten your leg.
45. Pants a bit too tight? Let them air dry and stretch the waistband by hand (or with a hairdryer) while they’re still damp.This one certainly has some practical uses. 25 / 101
WEAR WHATEVER THE FUCK YOU WANT. SHOW AS MUCH SKIN AS YOU WANT. 25 / 101
44. Still look chic while showing some skin: If you’re wearing a miniskirt or shorts, cover up on top. If your top is skimpy, go for full-coverage bottoms.
Again, winter? All I care about is staying warm. 25 / 101
45. Don’t underestimate the power of a well-fitting, stylish winter coat. You can be wearing pajamas underneath and you’ll still look perfectly put together.
44. Windex restores the glossy sheen on patent leather without doing any damage.Good to know! 26 / 101
I already fold my jeans like this...? 26 / 101
43. Fold jeans like a pro: Lay jeans on a flat surface, fold in half from left to right. Grab the stacked jean legs and fold them in half so the hem of the jeans lines up with the waistband. Fold the jeans in half one more time.
42. The power of a silk pillowcase isn't a myth: Not only do they prevent “sleep crease,” they’re much, much gentler on your skin and hair.I've never heard of this before. Do I care enough to drop cash on a silk pillowcase? Not right now, but maybe in the future. 27 / 101
41. “The best way to store fashion jewelry, including Sterling Silver, is in Ziploc bags. This helps pieces retain luster and reduces tarnishing and scratches.”—Jordann Weingartner, Founder, I Love Jewelry AuctionsYes, absolutely. 28 / 101
40. If the garment you’re ironing has delicate buttons or detailing, cover them with the bowl of a metal spoon and press the surrounding fabric.Kind of clever, I guess? 29 / 101
File this under "No Shit, Sherlock." 29 / 101
39. Don’t buy items you know you won’t properly care for. For example, if you know you’re never going to hand-wash that delicate cami or beaded sweater, don’t buy it.
That's nice. 29 / 101
38. “Pair flirty, feminine dresses with masculine spectator shoes for an effortless and unexpected look.” — Gabriella Perezutti, Designer, Candela
37. To achieve the perfectly effortless cuffed sleeve, keep the top button (which is called the gauntlet) buttoned while you roll.Good to know! 30 / 101
All of the shits I give about elongating my torso: _____. 30 / 101
36. V-neck sweaters and tees give the illusion of a longer torso.
Don't wear perfume, either! 30 / 101
35. Spritzed a bit too much perfume on yourself this morning? Use unscented, oil-based makeup remover to remove excess perfume.
34. Tend to wear certain leather shoes without socks? Always stuff them with a soft cloth when you’re done wearing them. This absorbs moisture and help the shoes keep their shape.But I am a grungy hippie who sometimes foregoes socks. 31 / 101
Still don't have pierced ears, though. 31 / 101
33. “Hoop earrings are a classic style that every woman—regardless of age—should have, but the type depends on your face. If you have a thin face, go for larger round or embellished hoops. If you have a round face an elongated hoop or drop style is best.” —Elena Kiam, Creative Director, Lia Sophia
32. Freeze jeans inside a plastic bag for two days to zap odor without running them through the washing machine.Handy! 32 / 101
Looking for an easy trick to make my bare legs look longer? No. 32 / 101
31. Looking for an easy trick to make your bare legs look longer? Try pumps the same color of your skin, which gives give the illusion that your legs extend a few extra inches.
30. Wrap an empty bottle of your favorite perfume in a handkerchief and tuck it into your underwear drawer for a subtle scent.Still no perfume. 32 / 101
29. Heat can warp your glasses frames, so always keep them in a hard case and never wear them on your head on a hot day.Well, considering I have to wear my glasses all the time, it's good to know but I can't do much about it. 33 / 101
28. Spray shirts prone to sweat stains with lemon juice before washing. The natural acid dissolves alkaline sweat residue that could cause yellow discoloration.Science! 34 / 101
Belts under the boobs is my favorite trick, but I already knew that. 34 / 101
27. “It’s a myth that loose styles flatter a large bust or a plus-size woman. The area just under the bust is a woman’s smallest torso measurement, so emphasizing it with a structured waistband that hits higher than your natural waist will make you look a size smaller. —BG Krishnan, President, eShakti.com
Still don't wear makeup. 34 / 101
26. Use shaving cream and a washcloth to remove liquid makeup from shirt collars.
Also make sure you are the skinniest girl in the room, with professionally done-up hair and makeup. 34 / 101
25. A modern trick to looking like the most effortlessly stylish girl in the room: Pair dressy bottoms (a velvet maxi, a leather or beaded skirt, silk pants) with a worn gray crew-neck sweatshirt or T-shirt.
24. When it doubt, always choose the smaller denim size, since jeans stretch with wear.True! 35 / 101
23. “Never dry a wet shoe with heat. Let it dry naturally in open air. Heat will dry out leather and the lifespan of the shoe will be cut in half.” —Jordan Adoni, Designer, Modern ViceMore leather tricks are always useful. 36 / 101
It's a fucking closet. 36 / 101
22. The easiest way to make your closet look organized: Buy all the same hangers for everything–same color, same shape.
21. Before bed, pour two or three tablespoons of baking soda into sweaty workout sneakers and tilt the shoe to distribute the soda evenly. This will eat any odor and absorb perspiration.I douse and douse my sneakers with baking soda but they always seem to be gross and smelly. Maybe I just wasn't using enough? 37 / 101
"Guaranteed" weight loss, okay there buddy. 37 / 101
20. “For guaranteed weight loss, I advise people to follow my A, B, C’s – no Alcohol, Bread or processed Carbs.”—David Kirsch, celebrity trainer and fitness guru.
If my clothes are coming from a suitcase, I've resigned myself to them being a least a little wrinkly. 37 / 101
19. To prevent clothing from wrinkling in a suitcase, fold everything in plastic dry cleaning bags.
18. If you can’t fit two fingers underneath your bra band comfortably, it’s probably too tight.Bra fitting tips are always good! 38 / 101
Another file for the "No Shit, Sherlock" category. 38 / 101
17. Pile on good accessories—scarves, sunglasses, hats, statement jewelry—to instantly transform even the most basic outfit.
16. Confused about laundry settings? Remember this: The hotter the water, the cleaner the clothing will be. While warm water is fine for most clothes, linens and dirty white clothing are best washed in hot water to remove germs and heavy soil. Cold water is usually used for delicates.But this is good to know! 39 / 101
15. A structured hat should rest about 1/8 to a 1/2-inch above the ears.Fitting tips are also good to know! 40 / 101
My hairdryer. Hahaha. 40 / 101
14. After a shower, use your hairdryer to de-mist bathroom mirrors in seconds.
Cleaning out the closet is a private time. 40 / 101
13. A good tip when cleaning out your closet: Ask a friend whose style you admire to come over and help. She/he might offer new insight on how to wear certain items before you toss them.
It definitely does sound "budget." I can't imagine this would turn out looking so well. I'd rather go with the double-sided tape or the iron-on hem tape. 40 / 101
12. It might sound “budget,” but a hot glue gun works amazingly well to hem skirts, pants and even jeans in a pinch.
I don't use heating pads. But I do wear mismatched socks! 40 / 101
11. Looking for uses for all the single socks you’ve amassed while doing laundry? When you’ve got aches or pains, fill a sock with dry beans or rice and pop it in the microwave for 30 seconds. Voila, an instant (and free) heating pad.
10. Wear your new real leather jacket in the rain to break it in. Water will soften up the leather and allow it to stretch and crease at specific points on your body.More leather! 41 / 101
Already do that. 41 / 101
9. Who has the time to hand wash bras? Machine wash them in cold water in a mesh zipper bag and drape them over a hanger to air dry.
Never self-tanner. Ever. 41 / 101
8. Use a lemon wedge to remove excess or streaky self-tanner.
A closet is a place where my clothes live. That's it. It doesn't need to be spacious or luxurious or anything, just where my clothes live. 41 / 101
7. Track lighting is possible even for the tiniest closet: Buy a track kit, screw it into the ceiling, run the wire down the wall and plug it into the nearest outlet. Not only will you see all your clothes better, but you’ll feel like you have a more luxurious closet.
Isn't this a repeat of #42? 41 / 101
6. Invest in silk or satin pillowcases to keep your hair from breaking during the night. (They also keep your skin looking smoother than rough cotton cases!)
5. If you’re unsure about an impulse or sale purchase, leave it at the store. If you’re still thinking about it when you wake up the next day, buy it.Good advice for anything, not just clothes. Namely books. And beads. 42 / 101
Have a sequin garment I don't wear anymore? Nope! 42 / 101
4. Have a sequin garment you don’t wear anymore? Remove the sequins and sprinkle them into a vase of flowers. Gorgeous!
That's kind of what's implied by their job description. 42 / 101
3. A good shoemaker can fully rebuild your favorite pair, even if the arch is cracked.
2. To coax a loose thread back into place, gently tug at the stitches to the sides of the pull as well as above and below.I should probably do this but I just snap the thread and hope for the best. 43 / 101
And of course the tackiest piece of non-advice is saved for the end. 43 / 101
1. There’s nothing cooler than sticking to a signature style you know looks good on you. Slaves to fashion are never chic!
43 out of 101 is more than I was expecting, to be honest. How many from the list could you use?